Top 10k strings from YS2 Issue 3 (1993)(Y-Not Software - Delta 4 Software).z80 in <root> / bin / z80 / software / Sinclair Spectrum Collection TOSEC.exe / Sinclair ZX Spectrum - Games / [Z80] /
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2 Number "+n$+"#","%
1 ~The Thing Monthly~","i5","%121 Singalongathing#","124 Carry On Exploiting The Comic
1 yourself repeatedly with the knife.","*"
1 your Speccy, Public House!#","
1 you to do it."
1 you just listen to old Sid. Yak, yak, yak!#","First, if ya lady love is 'olding a coupleof ripe fruits... yak, yak... you just go up to 'er and say ~Co
1 yak, yak, yak.~#","More hilarious consequences ensue if you
1 written - but it was no good. Everything
1 would give anything to get out, but,
1 wondering why he does it, and he's
1 window.","*"
1 went horribly wrong again, and we're usingDelta 4's Sceptical driver again.#","
1 wall to be built in your living room.
1 us as we receive lots of money for writingthings you desperately want to believe.#","Aries (Mar 21-Apr 20): A good month for usas we receive lots of money for writing
1 us as we receive lots of money for writingthings you desperately want to believe.#","
1 unavailable for comment, having been
1 true identity of Number 1. I happen to
1 today caught out by a university student.#","
1 thinking it's because he cares, and he's
1 things you desperately want to believe.#","Gemini (May 21-Jun 21): A good month for
1 them up. It seemed Alfred had once more
1 the size you want.","*"
1 the river!#","
1 the numbers 01100101, 47 and FE. This
1 the innovative* BBC sitcom, One Foot In
1 the Captain Blood story!#","If the text reader gets finished.#","Otherwise, lots more wibble!#","And plenty of bitterness and cynicism.#","And copyright abuse.","*"
1 switch, stick it down your trousers and gofor a ride on a rollercoaster."
1 successful with all the young beauties,
1 struck down when a freak wind blew the
1 straight round the bend,","They say it's drivel, it's rubbish,
1 songster Eric Idle.#","
1 small car. Fit wheels to it, stuff it withbricks, perch it on top of a steep hill,
1 slicea with a very sharp knife. Then stab
1 sent, for t
1 securely. If bored, nibble the parsnip."
1 saying, in an unnecessarily loud voice, ~Ihave three thousand dollars and a parsnip in my wallet and I am totally unarmed.~
1 saying, in
1 repeatedly stab yourself about the body
1 remembered Alfred was just a comic-book
1 recently holidayed in Scotland, returning with a relaxed and perkier hairstyle, and a packet of, and we quote, ~radioactive
1 reasonable prices.","@","
1 really wanted his brother Sponge, who
1 realising it's because he's too obstinate to let go, and he's going to bed.","*"
1 read the stories in Spec Tec Jr from
1 r! What a lovely
1 quite funny.","*"
1 question, George Formby: Why?#","Professor Sedgewick, speaking from a
1 previously unreleased tune by witty
1 popcorn~.#","This packet of Fizzi-Pop sherbet popcorn
1 performed by Jonathan Nash on membrane
1 penalty. Let yourself be caught, and your only explanation be that a parsnip told
1 party had broken out at the Collinses'.
1 parsnips until you get one the size of a
1 parsnip. Then shoot yourself."
1 pages of material scribbled down on some
1 onto it. Aim to hit the parsnip with your eye-socket. (This one may take several
1 off a nearby
1 o,w;p$;" "
1 o,o;"P";p;"
1 o+" Glace (or something)","%
1 nothing to do with YS2, so nyaahh.#","(
1 non-naughty part of the body?#","Write to the usual address (see page 200) and include your T-shirty preference and
1 nasty A4 paper. Ian's wibble included fourblank pages, some news stolen from Total! and lots to do with WWF.#","Sadly, by telling you this, we've used up all the available space, and so Hammer's
1 mutants and collecting parts of your
1 musical trends,","I'm driving sane people
1 move some sections of YS over to YS2.
1 month's Y-Nots were:","
1 monster, then bring him to life. Use the
1 lovely Delta 4. All the words in YS2 are
1 lie at the bottom, and wait."
1 letters, you will reveal the name of The
1 large member. Yak, yak, yak!~","*"
1 laboratory, working under the supervision of Professor Jurgen Sedgewick, have
1 keyboard and bongos, and he's very tired, because it's 03:26 and he's once again
1 juicy pair you've got there missus! Yak,
1 issue.#","Ah; fraud.","*"
1 inexplicably, you find yourself unable to leave.#","
1 indeed a supreme being in the universe.#","
1 hours. When it's solid, belabour yourself about the head with it very hard indeed."
1 have got away with it if it hadn't been
1 have a few back issues here at very
1 hand as you shoot yourself with the other."
1 ground and throw yourself out of a tree
1 from a shotgun and fit it into a suitable
1 from Future to print it?#","
1 for you meddling kids.~ Steve was
1 firepoles, but watch out for patches of
1 everyone washed their hands? Happy?",":) Yes.","
1 dismissing the idea entirely, and he's
1 discovered the answer to that eternal
1 didn't play a ukelele and was actually
1 d*"ys23-all.c"
1 crafted shuriken. Commission an elastic
1 could be yours to treasure and even eat ifyou can answer the following question.#","
1 correct answers in a hat and got a famous celeb to picker the winner. We chose Paul Merton. Being the type of guy he is, he
1 copyright of their respective authors.
1 copyright notice was missing from that
1 confronted by men with large knives."
1 computer user not knowing what to do.
1 commissioning an entirely new one to be
1 come to the conclusion that The Village isno less than a British Rail waiting room.#","
1 clinically insane rampaging wildebeest.
1 chunk of very juicy parsnip. Lie back withyour mouth open."
1 character serving a famous comic-book herohe was impersonating rather badly.#","Suddenly the Brucephone rang. Another
1 caught increase mathematically by a factorof two per issue?#","
1 caricature T-shirt sort of thing.#","
1 carefully considered.#","
1 been shirking his duties. Then Batmac
1 become campaign manager for an MP who's a well-built bloke... yak, yak... 'cos then you can walk about shoutin' ~Vote for my
1 bathroom cabinet in Todmorton, revealed itwas all a mistake, and that they
1 back instead of a parachute.","*"
1 b&w Spec Tec Jr ~I am not a number~
1 attempts.)"
1 at the YS2 address. (Page 200.) Mark your entries ~Ralph Bakshi~.","*"
1 and what's more they claim,","It all sounds the same.","*"
1 amazingly useful interaction between birosand cassette spools, despite their totallyunconnected invention, proves there is
1 actually managed to pull a fish out of thehat. So, unfortunately, no winners!#","
1 Your horoscope","(
1 Yes, this page has been specially reservedfor one lucky reader to use any way he or she likes!#","
1 YS2 issue 3. DRJ 7/5/93 0418
1 YS2 c/o YS","
1 XQQQ, XXX, XXX, QXX, XQXQQQXXX, QQX
1 Words to be found: XQQ, QXQ, XQQQ, QXQ,
1 Words (c) 1993. Music (c) 1971","*"
1 With Russell Fatblokeand Patrick Rich#","i6","%Pisces (Feb 20-Mar 20): A good month for
1 Winky?",";) Yes.","
1 Well, what Steve says is all well and goodbut it's not quite on the button. Just
1 Well, we tried to get another text reader - we even went to the lengths of
1 Well, as promised, we put all of the
1 Villainy?","}:> Har har, my pretty.","
1 Universe's Creator Foiled By Student","%
1 UPriz Explained O
1 Time, gentlemen, please.#","Damn. Ah well, next month, eh?","*"
1 Throw the parsnip shuriken at the wall andhope desperately that they'll rebound backat you and kill you."
1 Thing Monthly's editor, Alf.","?3","X Q X Q Q Q X X X","Q X X L A F Q X X","Q Q X Q Q Q Q Q X#","
1 They're just not going to understand this one at all.","*"
1 The student, Steve, realised that the
1 The station manager is Number 2, the
1 The risibly easy question is: What is
1 The funniest line ever printed in YS:#","(","@
1 The first bird called at 0351. DRJ 7/6/93 0428
1 The Superheroes","%Somewhere in the seething metropolis...#","
1 The Priz Explained Once More!","%
1 The Prisoner Explained Again!","%
1 The Grave.","?7","
1 The Bestish Bits Of
1 TMat Beal (Bumble bees,
1 Stuart Campbell (Fizzi-Pop compo)","
1 Struggle madly nevertheless when you are
1 Steve Anderson (The Priz Explained Again, Existence of God)","
1 Statue of Liberty through his bedroom
1 Splash.","*"
1 South Hetton in Durham, who sent in nine
1 Snow White and the Seven Textblokes","i6","%
1 Slipping on the fashionable dinner suit ofhis alter ego Bruce Spruce, Batmac accusedYS2 of prevarication, a charge they
1 Sit down and wait."
1 Singalongathing","%
1 Simon Cooke (The Priz Explained Once More,T-shirt compo)","
1 Sid James' Love Tips (Yak Yak)","i5","%'Allo! If you want to know 'ow to be
1 See you next month. Probably.","*"
1 Santa?","*<:) Yo ho ho.","
1 Sadly, the reader we called on was out, soit's a complete waste of space really.","*"
1 Rudolfy?",">:@ You bet.","
1 Rovers are those boxy motorised carts, andthe BR leaflets are obviously Tally Hos.#","
1 Reader's Page!","%
1 QX,QXX, QXX","*"
1 Public House
1 Professor reveals reason for George Formby","i5","%Scientists at the Los Alamos research
1 Probably. But before we reach them, here'sa chance to win either a full-colour
1 Parsnip Is Incidentally Involved
1 Overall: 63%#","
1 Oh, shut up.","*"
1 Oh no.","%
1 Oh no, not the bloodyTetley tea folk again","*"
1 Now before we sit down for supper, has
1 Not to mention unhealthy.#","
1 Nobody wants to be there, and most people
1 No. You see, I cunningly made sure the
1 Next Month in YS2!","%Some reviews, the real Public House, and
1 Move around the 20 levels, avoiding the
1 Monthly can exclusively publish a
1 Mon 7 Jun 93
1 Mm-mmm! Delicious!#","
1 Mighty Mouse cartoons. Who is responsible for them?#","Send your answers to: Ralph Bakshi compo
1 Method:","Put a packet of chocolate biscuits in the fridge overnight.#","
1 Mat Beal (Bumble bees, Funniest Line)","
1 Mart Beetroot's Puzzle Patch","i5","%
1 Loses a bit without the photo really.#","*"
1 Look! That car has swerved off that bridgeand is poised precariously 100 feet over
1 Leigh Loveday (Parsnips, Parsnips 2)","
1 Klunge?","*"
1 Klunge!","%","
1 Jonathan is a big fan of Ralph Bakshi's
1 January to March and you'll find out the
1 It's official. The Priz was actually a flyon-the-wall station documentary.","*"
1 It's acceptable within the context of the artistic expression.#","You're making that up.#","
1 It appears to be an alternate theme for
1 In a prepared statement, YS2 said:#","?13","
1 In a prepared statement, God said, ~I'd
1 If only Not-Turn-Up Man was here!#","Later...#","
1 Ian Slavin (Snow White)","*"
1 Ian Hamilton (Hammer's Fun)","
1 I'm so happy, I could sing! Aarghh.","*"
1 I'm not. I read it somewhere.#","Anyway, haven't we got to get permission
1 I have to admit,","That's making my music sound crap a bit,","I'd do something else, but Idle's my name,","It all sounds the same,","It all sounds the same,","It all sounds the same...","
1 Hooded Claw-style trap involving a lot of weights, pulleys and ropes, the end resultbeing a nail-stuffed parsnip projected at great force into your head."
1 Hooded Claw-sty!
1 Hey, do you know our chances of getting
1 Hello again and welcome to the patch. Thismonth we have a word search for you. When you have crossed out the words below from the grid and shuffled up the remaining
1 Hammer's Fun","i4","%Sport of the month is Ian Hamilton of
1 Hahahahaha. Shut up. Hahaha.","*"
1 Grumpy?",":( Yes.","
1 G8M$BSw;p$
1 Fun will not be appearing.#","*"
1 Fizzy Popcorn compo","%Stuart 'By the way, etc etc' Campbell
1 Fatal Error.#","
1 FRANK N STEIN","%
1 Entropy/Spec Tec Jr compo","%Are there no limits to our generosity?
1 Entropy's favourite and entirely
1 Entropy (SAM coding group) T-shirt, or a
1 Empire State Building."
1 D93. Music (c)
1 Consequently, as a bold experiment, YS2 isproud to present, for the first time on
1 Christmas edition of The Thing Monthly?
1 C:\>thingmonthly","Error. Invalid command. Please type again.#","
1 C:\>run setup utility","Unknown command. Hard disk error due to
1 C:\>help","Help is unavailable. System error. Invalidsetup. Run setup utility.#","
1 C:\>directory","Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.","*"
1 Bumble bees","i5","%Bumble bees are stupid.#","They're so stupid, they don't even realisethat they can't possibly fly.#","It's been proven by top aero-engineers.#","Bumble bees.#"," ","@Huh.","*"
1 Bisquits Chocolats a"+
1 Bewildery?",":o I don't know. I'm confused.","
1 Batmac Returns","i3","%Batmac sprang to his feet and gathered
1 Bath BA1 2BW#","%
1 Badly Faked Competition Photograph","%Do you remember the competition in the
1 B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y and Z, and
1 Apart from donating a small piece of brownplastic tape, Future Publishing had
1 American state retaining the death
1 Alistair Fairweather and Mark Beeton (The Thing Monthly)","
1 After far too many train journeys, I've
1 After extensive research, The Thing
1 After 2000 years of reclusion, God was
1 Adventures In Multitasking","i6","%
1 AcPenelope Pitstop/
1 A_Feb 20-Ma
1 30 Monmouth Street","
1 197 End bit#","@",".07","
1 190 Trackless wastes#","
1 180 Devoid of words#","
1 170 Not full#","
1 160 General space#","
1 150 Public House
1 140 Fatal veg 2
1 130 Fatal vegetables
1 120 The Thing
1 110 News headlines
1 ,"i6","%It seemed an outrageously clever idea to
1 ,"%While we grab a quick 40 winks.","@","
1 *Funny.","*"
1 (c) Y-Not Software/Delta 4","*"
1 (To be continued.)","*"
1 (Etc.)","*"
1 (Continued on next page)","*"
1 "i6","You see I write my music in C,","I go to A through B-flat and B,","Then I repeat it time after time,","Adding words to make the thing rhyme.#","So now you see how easy it is,","For people in the song writing biz,","But still the last two lines of this verseHave given me a reason to curse.#","It's my consistent persistence
1 "i6","Yes, I'm here today to tell you,","How to earn a quick bob or two,","Just write a theme tune for BBC,","You think it's hard? No! Listen to me;#","I've written songs since '71,","Writing songs is my kind of fun,","Using chords you've all heard before,","But I still sit down and write more.#","They say it's boring, ignoring
1 "i6","Are you sure we can print that?#","
1 "i6","@YS2 accused of wasting space","%
1 "i5","(;","@
1 "i2","(#","@Don't#",".40","be#","so#",".36","silly.","*"
1 "^Two","Inject a parsnip with a particularly vile chemical waste and eat it."
1 "^Three","Position a parsnip point-upwards on the
1 "^Ten","Set up a complicated Penelope Pitstop/
1 "^Six","Soak a parsnip in cement for several
1 "^Seven","Spend years breeding a rat that lives onlyon parsnip. Starve it for a few days, thenmake sure it sees you swallowing a large
1 "^One","Sharpen a parsnip to a needle-point and
1 "^Nine","Concentrate on cultivating enormous
1 "^Four","Slice a parsnip into a number of finely
1 "^Five","Find a large parsnip, hollow it out, fill it with explosives and a mercury tilt
1 "^Eight","Remove the entire projection mechanism
1 "It's 02:05, so:#","(","@
1 "@Still Credit Time","i4","%The Sceptical driver is copyright of the
1 "@Credit Time","i3","%YS2 was brought to you by the letters A,
1 "@And The Final Credit","i5","%Everything not previously credited was
1 "+Two","Push a parsnip up your nostril with one
1 "+Three","Throw yourself from a great height out of an aeroplane with a parsnip tied to your
1 "+Ten","Walk round the back alleys of the Bronx
1 "+Six","Go on a pedestrian-killing spree in any
1 "+Seven","Find a carrier bag. Place a parsnip in it.Put the bag over your head and fasten
1 "+One","Hold on to a parsnip as you jump off the
1 "+Nine","Plant a parsnip carefully in a field, thenwalk casually into another field full of
1 "+Four","Cut a parsnip meticulously into thin
1 "+Five","Grip a parsnip between your teeth and lie down on a railway line. Wait patiently."
1 "+Eight","Tape a parsnip to your forehead and throw yourself off a nearby pier."
1 "(;","i5","@News Headlines","%111 Student proves existence of God#","112 YS2 accused of prevarication#","113 Reason for George Formby discovered#","114 YS2 accused of wasting space","*"
1 "(;","@
1 "(;",".9","@
1 "(",".8","@
1 Ten Ways To Kill Yourself With A Parsnip #"
1 Parsnip Is Incidentally Involved
1 Issue 3#","%
1 Turn to page 197 "
1 Ten Ways To Kill Yourself In Which A
1 Possibilities Of Innunendo#","125 The Superheroes#","126 Puzzle Patch#","127 Artificial Incompetence#","128 Badly Faked Competition Photograph","*"